[ 05-19-03 ] [ 5:32 p.m.]
[ Adventures in Boyland ]

Tim confuses me.

At first, he was all pissy about me and Alex. Now today after school, he gave me advice on how to properly reel him in.

He says I have to be sincere and up-front, and that I can't expect to get him to go out with me through a note.

I kinda knew that, but it worked for me one time to get a first-timer through a note, so why wouldn't it work again?

Apparently Alex is the type of guy that respects a girls' up-front... ness.

I kinda knew that, too, but here's where we revert to the "Heather has no self-confidence when it comes to serious, potentially life-altering things" philosophy.

Tim says I should tell Alex I love him.

I can see one major flaw in that plan - I'm not sure that I'm in love with him. It's a major infatuation, one I could become physically attached to, a la obsession with Tony Stewart, but I'm really not sure it's love.

I asked Zach what his definition of "love" is. He told me that even though I get loopy around Alex, butterflies in stomach and all, that that's not love. I kind of agree with him.

That's more like "teenage-giggly-girl disease".

And better still, what'll happen if I tell Alex I love him? I'm pretty sure he wouldn't say the same. In fact, I think that would scare him off.

I have no fucking clue.

Help!

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